UFC 100

I'm back!

Brought out of retirement by boredom and being fired up by hypocrites. UFC 100 just wrapped up, and the most controversial win of the night was Brock Lesnar over Frank Mir. Not because of how it ended, but due to the fact that so called "purist" couldn't handle the fact that this ex-pro wrestler destroyed a "true mix martial artist" in Mir.

Long story short, after Brock annihilated Mir, he flipped off the crowd that was booing him and gave one of the greatest post-fight interviews ever. Complete with commentary on mounting his wife.

People are lashing out against the clearly better fighter due to pride, ignorance, and frankly being pussies. MMA isn't human cockfighting, but it's not chess either. MMA is about who has the biggest swinging dick (see. Michael Lewis, "Liar's Poker") in a man v. man scenario. Brock laid down the testosterone in copious amounts.

Now people are revolting the supposedly derogatory antics of the now unanimous champion. Sorry people, but this is what you signed up for. After being booed by the vast majority of crowd, you feel as if he would have fought every single one of them to shut them up. You know what? He would have beat them all.

MMA is about artistry and technique. It's not mindless brawling, but it does take on bravado and machismo more than any sport on earth. When two heated rivals enter the ring, and one embarrasses the other...expect braggadocio. Expect vulgarity. Expect cockiness. This is what you signed up for. As much as MMA fans want the sport to go mainstream, it will, but not on anyone else's terms.

Grow up. Don't settle for political correctness, don't try to treat this sport as if it's fucking polo. For those that were turned of by Brock's post fight...go to hell. You can not like Brock, but don't act as if this is disgusting or lewd. This is what you spent your 50 bucks for.

MLB Preview 2009

The Phils are back as defending World Series Champions. It'll be difficult to repeat, but here are my predictions.


AL East:



The Sox have the strongest pitching staff and bullpen in the East. Need maintained productivity from Pedroia and Youkilis.

AL Central:



Most steady team in the Central. Always competitive and with Francisco Liriano healthy, solidifies the rotation. Their line-up is packed with speed, but driving in runs outside of Morneau is an issue. I'm tired of waiting for the Indians to come around. Look out for those Kansas City Royals

AL West:



The most boring division in the AL. Angels are the perennial favorites and with a solid bullpen and power up and down the line-up, why not? I think the A's will provide some friendly competition.

NL West:



I'm sure the Dodgers are the favorite, but they were very average last year before Manny. Without that energy Manny gave when he first showed up, things could be as dull and Joe Torre's expression during a game. In steps the D'Backs who have the best collection of young talent in the division. They need some of their Baby Backs to play to their level.

NL Central:



The Cubbies will win the division again, but with some more pressure from the St. Louis Cardinals. Keep in mind though, between Rich Harden, Ryan Dempster, Carols Zambrano, and Derek Lee this team could go down fast.

NL East:



Oh yes. Taking the division again. This time, by outright beating the Mets, not waiting for them to collapse. I'll say about the Phils, that is true of any good team, have great defense and bullpen. The Mets are weaker in the line-up, defense, starting pitching, and I'm not sold on their newly formed bullpen.

NL Wildcard:



Yeah, I guess the Mets may be around. I would love it if the Dodgers or Cards could come in and knock them off.

AL Wildcard:



The Rays will get back in. It'll be a fight, especially with the AL Central moving along. Too much bad mojo going around for the Yanks.

AL MVP:

Josh Hamilton-Just because he's winning the Triple Crown

NL MVP:

Chase Utley-He was due last year. He'll get it this year.

AL Cy Young:

Daisuke Matsuzaka-The World Baseball Classic gave him some juice. He could be ready to break out and dominate, not nibble by.

NL Cy Young:

Ricky Nolasco-The Marlins are going to be good. Ricky No is about to become a superstar.

NL Rookie of the Year:

Tommy Hanson-Because a random rookie pitcher always jumps to the front of the pack for this thing.

AL Rookie of the Year:

Matt Wieters-I don't actually believe this, but I wanted to mention that Wieters is being compared to Chuck Norris in the fact that he has his own little ridiculous sayings. Such as, "Matt Wieters took batting practice today. There were no survivors."

Ryan Howard HR: 51

Worst Phillie: Eric Bruntlett

World Series:

Phillies v. Twins

PHILS BACK TO BACK!!! WHOOOO!

MLB: Man-Crush Fantasy Team

I was mocked by a kind reader a while back about my Top 5: Guys I'd Wanna Be list. He made some mention about my sexual preference, and although I found it to be out of nowhere and said more about his sexual preference than mine. Well this article won't help me at all, but I don't care. It's baseball season, I just had my keeper league draft, and it's time to rundown some of my favorite fantasy baseball guys (both known and sleeper) for the year. Plus this article is sponsored by the Paul Rudd-Jason Segal movie, "I Love You, Man" in theaters now. Ok, maybe not. Onwards!



CATCHER: PABLO SANDOVAL

The key with a catcher is really playing time and runs scored. Both are the hardest things to fill because due to the physically taxing nature of the position, you'll only get a guy out there for 130-140 games max. In fantasy you need players to play. So with Sandoval qualifying for the C in Yahoo! fantasy leagues, people should take advantage. Sandoval will most likely play in the field most of the year, making up for those lost games. Plus with the Giants offense being so weak, Sandoval is easily one of the most productive players on that team, and someone has to drive in runs.








FIRST BASE: ALBERT PUJOLS

I'm certainly not breaking the mold here, but Pujols is just such a dominant force. He was nursing an injured elbow last year, in a miserable line-up. Now he's back, healthy, and has an improved line-up (whether that's him making guys like Ryan Ludwick better or not). He'll put up his typical MVP numbers as he continues to be one of the best players in baseball.
















SECOND BASE: CHASE UTLEY

For the defending World Series Champs, Chase Utley. After an MVP type start, Chase was hindered by a bum hip, which he played through for the second half and the playoffs. He had surgery in the offseason, and rumor was he could be out up to a month into the season. Phils fans had no doubt though, Chase is a gamer. Wouldn't you know it, he's back already, diving after grounders and just cracked his first homer of the spring. He'll round into form nicely. Plus he also had the highlight of the Phils World Series celebration.



THIRD BASE: ALEX GORDON

Fantasy players have been waiting for a couple years now for Gordon to fulfill his hype coming out of the draft. Gordon, thought to be the next George Brett, has struggled in his first couple of years in the league. He still has trouble with lefties, and his average and power numbers are expected more out of Eric Bruntlett than the #2 pick of the MLB draft. The heart still lingers to see if this natural talent can finally pull through. Just the mere mention by one fantasy guru hinting at the possibility of a 40 HR 120 RBI still makes mouths water. He's starting to have a line-up built around him. A little protection and a little more experience might bring about the Gordon everyone has been waiting for.







SHORTSTOP: HANLEY RAMIREZ

Hanley Ramirez! #1 on the fantasy board and #1 in my heart. I've had this guy on my keeper team for 3 years now, and at 25 he is becoming an outright monster. Han-Ram went 30/30 last year with 125 runs scored, his RBI's suffered because he batted lead off, but he'll be third in the line-up now. His steals may drop, but if 30/30 is on the table, I have to think Hanley will go for it. Expect 100+RBI with 110 runs, and pretty much A-Rod numbers minus some RBI and plus steals. He'll only get better and I can't wait.





RIGHTFIELD: ANDRE ETHIER

Ethier came into his own last year when Manny Ramirez arrived. Whether it was the protection in the line-up or the mental boost of having one of the best right handed hitters ever on deck, Andre settled in and had a monster second half. He finished with 20 HR and 77 RBI, but his ceiling is much higher than that.





CENTERFIELD: JOSH HAMILTON

One of the more miraculous comebacks in sports history, the former and, well, current can't miss prospect has had a coming of age over the past two years. This year will be the culmination of that return from drug abuse that nearly wiped away his career and life. He is the most potent player in an absolutely stacked offensive line-up. If Hamilton's health can keep up then 40+HR and a possible triple crown run is in his future.













LEFTFIELD: JAY BRUCE

Every year there is a super prospect that comes to the bigs. There was Ryan Braun, Evan Longoria, Matt Wieters this year, and Jay Bruce last year. Bruce did have some struggles on his way to his 21 bombs. He was in and out of the line-up, being shuffled in the order, but now his position is set, and he'll have the people around him to allow him to produce. He'll hit for a higher average, and his power numbers will go up as he matures.







STARTING PITCHER: CLAYTON KERSHAW

Kershaw is another big upside guy. He had his first full year last year, and his stats are eerily similar to the break out pitcher of last year, Tim Lincecum. Kershaw has control issues that he needs to overcome, but with a better team behind him, he could put up slightly less dominant numbers than Lincecum did last year.


CLOSING PITCHER: JASON MOTTE

I didn't know who Jason Motte was before spring training, but in the hunt for the next Cardinals closer, Motte and his 100 mph fastball has rocketed him to the top of that list. With Chris Perez injured and Ryan Franklin useless, the job is probably going to be Motte's to start the year and his to lose as the season moves along. The Cards closers always puts up big numbers, and as long as La Russa sticks with Motte, it should be man-crush city.

The Might of a Fight

The latest move by the brainiacs that run the NHL (stands for National Hockey League for those that don't recall the sports organ-I-zation) is to limit and eventually stop fighting in hockey.

Just as a bit of background, the NHL was once the least popular of the big four sports (baseball, football, basketball, hockey) then under the leadership of now NHL Commissioner Gary Bettman, has subsequently completely fallen off the national sports radar behind golf, MMA, tennis, soccer, and even figure skating. Once seen on ESPN several nights a week, the NHL is now on Versus, a channel hardly anyone can find or care to look for. Visibility is at an all time low, oh, and did I mention there was a strike a couple of seasons back. A strike! It's laughable. So that's where the NHL is now, and here is where it's going...the way of the fucking brontosaurus.


To the non-sports fan, no fighting should sound like a positive, but in hockey it's a part of the culture. Not only legal since as long as I've heard anything about hockey, fighting is a safe way to protect other players on the ice. See these are large guys, flying around on blades throwing elbows, sticks, and anything they can in order to gain an advantage on a play, while not drawing a penalty. When players get a little carried away, to the point where it's upsetting to the other team, then two representatives from each team will have a conversation on the ice and throw down their gloves and have at it. Sure, sometimes it gets out of control, or sometimes way too in control, but that's the nature of the game. It's a tough sport originated by tough Canadians, who had nothing better to do in Ontario on a freezing pond.

The problem with this movement, aside from the in-game enforcement aspect, is that it is par for the course for what is killing the sport of hockey. It is trying to be like every other sport. This selling out in order to become mainstream has been going on for some time, since the NHL made notable efforts to increase scoring in the league. Granted, at the time, all the clutching and grabbing was not hockey, but larger goals, smaller pads, technologically advanced sticks have all accomplished this goal. Then they expanded. Took teams out of Canada and into Florida, Anaheim, and Columbus to make it more of an American sport. All absolutely terrible moves.

Now removing fighting is the one side of the sport that you can walk up to a non-hockey fan, and actually get him or her excited about watching a hockey game. The parts of the sport the NHL should be marketing, the flash, the speed, the fighting and the attitude are being muted in order to fit in with the cool kids.

A prime example is what happened with Sean Avery. The infamous agitator referred to his ex-girlfriend, Elisha Cuthbert, as "sloppy seconds" during an interview. This garnered headlines and press for the NHL in an ESPN world where no one cares. Clearly, this was in poor taste, but the NHL should spin this bad publicity into the kind of passion in sports fans. It's good vs. evil, rivalries and opinions. That's what gets people into sports.

How did the NHL handle it? They suspended Avery, which was fair, then basically dragged him through the streets like he was a Holocaust denier or something. He lost his job with the Stars, which was the team he was with at the time, relegated to the minors and banished until the NY Rangers came calling. If this happened in baseball or the NFL, you'll probably get some disciplinary action, and this has probably happened multiple times in the NBA and no one raised an eyebrow. If there is an opening to get some attention for your business, then you have to jump on it. The NHL once again turned away and just wanted to be a square peg trying to get into a round hole.

Hockey isn't just another sport. It is unique and they have to accept that. Grow in Canada, focus abroad, and realize that due to the semi-complex rules and low scoring it will never be on par with football or baseball. The NHL has it's best chance in being something different. A change of pace for the sports fan who is looking for a different outlet. There will always be the diehard fans in the NHL, always. It's a matter of getting those people who aren't fans. Fighting is a way to do that. But the NHL will never learn.

Stairway to Singles

What's your favorite album?

...

Maybe you have a stock answer ready to go. Maybe you need to explain why this album means this, and that album means that.

What's your favorite single?

...

I can bet you don't have a stock answer for that. It's an odd question. If narrowing down an album is difficult enough, try finding one singular song that sums up you.

Your answer to the former of my two questions is becoming less and less important. The days of albums are dwindling. I don't mean vinyl records or even CD's, I mean the concept of an album. A gathering of songs by an artist for distribution.

What got me thinking about this was that, for the first time, I read how the #1 Downloaded Song is Flo Rida's "Right Round," which shattered the 1,000,000 download mark faster than any single in history. That used to be the way Billboard wrote about albums.

Now, instead, there is Flo Rida, who has the #1 Single on iTunes as just that, a single. There is no album, no other tracks. He has generated over $1 million in gross income purely off of a single. A single that is using a sampling of Dead or Alive's "You Spin Me 'Right Round (Like a Record)" that was released in 1987!

What this all means is that in a world where album sales have fallen, artists want more and more money, and record companies looking to cash in quick, what is stopping the whole industry from just becoming a giant one-hit wonder factory?

Release a single on iTunes, get in on the radio, and let the money pour in. People don't want whole albums any more. They want to pick and choose individual songs for their library. More often than not, those individual songs are going to be songs like "'Right Round" or Lady GaGa's "Poker Face." There's no interest in hearing other songs, just the one's people know and want to hear.

Consider how music has become completely static over the years. Starting with the boy bands you had a formula. Sure it's been around forever, but it was done well by Michael Jackson or George Michael. Those 80's icons that made memorable songs. Instead as music has become more and more bastardized, we get less and less iconic names and more forgettable songs.

Go listen to "Gives You Hell" by All-American Rejects or Kelly Clarkson's "My Life Would Suck Without You." Are people going to revere these songs and artists like those of 20 years ago? Hell no. There are #1 singles from 4 years ago I can't even remember who sang them.

When you can take a subpar late 80's pop song, use the hook, rap over it about girls or going out or what clothes you wear, and make millions, that is sending the wrong message to everyone. Music loses it's creativity and it's motivation. How can there be any in a world where relevant, intelligent, and should be iconic bands, like TV on the Radio or M.I.A. are left to the minority to fight it out for minor acclaim?

It used to be that one-hit wonder was a negative. It was embarrassing. It showed that a blind squirrel can find a nut. Every so often you'd get a great on-hit wonder that would live on forever. Now, to be a one-hit wonder is a great thing. Just keep on doing it. Don't worry about a whole album. Just spurt out pop-infused blather over a catchy hook and let your $.99 roll in hand over fist. Artists are becoming less artists and more jukebox. Hey J-Kwon, give me a song about being "Tipsy" or if I'm in college, maybe I just want to spend three and a half minutes listening to a song about how much I love college?! Thanks, Asher Roth! I mean REALLY?! with Rob Grundlock. This is taking us to a place that I don't want to go. A place that society pretty much demands, and no one is going to go out of their way to stop.

There are no Nirvanas or Led Zeppelins coming because they don't do what popular culture demands of their artist, they make music...not singles.

MVP of SI Swimsuit?

Miss Irina Shayk

Sports?

Sports can bring a lot of joy and teach a lot of lessons to people. I know whether I've been watching sports or playing them, I've learned something that I can safely say I would not have learned in any other facet of my life. So after a couple of weeks where Michael Phelps is hitting a 'marijuana pipe' aka A BONG, the Yankees are spending half a billion dollars during a recession year, and A-Roid coming clean about his dirty past, you can kind of lose focus on what makes sports so enjoyable.

In what is now a business filled with me-first, selfish and spoiled players, how can I enjoy something that promotes Pacman Jones's lifestyle? Why would I fork over my time and money for a bunch of millionaires on the field who could not care less whether I root for them or watch a rerun of 30 Rock?

When I was at a time of such reflection, the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition came out. Instantaneously I was pulled back to all that was good about sports. My sports universe had a center again, and I think that center occurs somewhere around the trifolds of Bar Refaeli's cover. So thank you SI, and thank you Bar. Feel free to get in touch with me.

Friday Night Lights

So I finally got around to watching Friday Night Lights, the much heralded but viewerless TV show on NBC that is based off of the movie of the same name. I've heard many times how good of a show this was, and normally my reaction is to revolt and ignore the possibility of this program being any good. Hence, the show debuted in 2006, and I'm now watching in 2009. Thanks to Hulu this process has been cost-effective and also enabled me to run through the program pretty quickly. I'm around the half way point of Season 1 and wanted to share some thoughts to get some people in on the fun.

Plain and simple, if you like any of the following things in any combination at all then you will like this show:
A. Sports
B. Hot girls
C. Unintentionally funny actors trying to be athletes
D. Ridiculous sporting event scenarios
E. Gossip
F. Actors that are clearly in their mid-20's playing high school kids

So there you go, I think that covers pretty much everyone. Now here are some more specific thoughts.

This show has more hot girls pound for pound than any show on TV...ever. The list is a murder's row of attractive ladies. Connie Britton, as coach's wife, is the anchor, then you have Minka Kelly, Adrianne Palicki, Aimee Teagarden, Taylor Kitsch... Whoops, forgot that was a dude. He is what the Sports Guy call "uncomfortably handsome." Anyway, the dude aside, it is a feast for the eyes, and adds to the fact that virtually every frame is filled with a lovely lady to move the story along.

Even prime time shows like Melrose Place and Beverly Hills 90210 had some subpar talent milling around with the beauties (Tori Spelling). FNL just said screw it, we'll give the people what they want.

The one down note is that it makes you bitter that you didn't go to school with girls like this. It is that unrealistic and yet, we all wish it was how things were. Then again Minka and Adrianne are much older than a high schooler, so it lays some unfair standards for people to set their goals by.

That sort of brings me to my next thought. Through half the first year, I cannot tell who is better looking, Minka Kelly or Adrianne Palicki. The thing is that I can't make the decision because I figure their characters into my evaluation. Minka plays head cheerleader and overall goodie goodie, Lyla Garrity. That's all well and good, but then she cheats on her parapalegic boyfriend with his best friend! Only on TV, I know. So that's major negative points.

Adrianne Palicki's character is the tramp, rabble rouser, vixen that any drama involving beautiful people need. It's the typical Shannon Doherty/Heather Locklear role. So those are negatives, then again she is much more of a fun character than Lyla. It's still a toss up, and if I never come to a decision, I'll live, but I'll wait until the end of the season where hopefully things will become clear one way or another.

I will never like Matt Saracen. I don't care if he watches over

his grandmom.

The Dillon Panthers win more ridiculous games than any real or fictional team in history. If they played in Philly, people would be complaining that with out a few favorable bounces this team would be 1-3 not 3-1 or whatever. Then again Philly is naturally negative, while Dillon lives and breathes for a high school team.

Secretly I want Jason Street to make a full recovery, then get the itch to play pro ball, have a whole training montage thing, then ship him up to the Canadian Football League where he'd get discovered and go to the NFL. It's a little Gordon Bombay in Mighty Ducks and Kurt Warner's story put together. Only with hotter girls and drama involved. Not a bunch of punk kids from S-7 or the annoying look of Kurt Warner.

Movie Thoughts

The Unborn is a new movie out from the co-writer of The Dark Knight. While little buzz is being generated about this flick, it got my attention because it stars Glockthoughts favorite, Miss Odette Yustman.



Also, speaking of horror films, what's the deal with the My Bloody Valentine 3D movie? Great idea or horrible idea? Is everyone going to die by thrown pick axe or other random object being tossed at the victim? If I was 15, I would definitely go see this.



For a movie I haven't heard anything about and only saw trailers for, that Taken movie looks pretty solid.

The Plane! The Plane!

I've been following this story for the past couple of days, and just have to share a couple of thoughts.

What is this guys thought process? Obviously, he did something wrong. So, he apparently tried to fake his own death in order to escape any persecution. However, he did so by pulling off probably the worst fake death ever. Let's make a fake SOS call about how your windshield shattered, sending thousands of pieces of windshield gas into your body, presumably leaving you a bloody mess and on your way to death.

All well and good, but how would you explain when people find your plane with no blood and no body in there? Plus, apparently any half-ass pilot could tell that auto pilot was on and with a door open on the plane, clearly indicate someone jumped out.

If you have a plane, why not just fly to Mexico? If you truly want to kill yourself, well, then how about finding a more effective method. If you want to plead insanity, then you're off to a good start, but it'll be hard to carry that far back enough to get you out of defrauding any clients of yours.

Then, after he crashed the plane (!!!!) and parachuted down, he went to authorities, asked for help, checked in to a hotel under a fake name (while being recorded by security cameras), left abruptly and grabbed a motorcycle he was holding in a garage and just drove off. Where the hell was he going? What was his end game plan? Just cruise around on his hog for the rest of his life? Why crash so close to home? I mean, if I had to run out of my house right now, I could figure out a better escape plan than this guy.

I guess that's what happens when a douchebag tries to escape the crimes of his greed and selfishness.

This case really creates a lot more questions than it answers.

Hiatus

So, I haven't been updating this thing as much. Maybe people have noticed, maybe no one cares but me. I will say that I still have the urge to write, just to get stuff off my mind (which is why I started this thing), but things have been pretty busy for me. So with only so much time in a day, it's hard to set aside an hour or two to write something worth reading.

Maybe I should change the format to make it a little more...blog like (sigh). But I'm going to try and avoid that. Maybe just put shorter posts, 2-3 times a week. Whatever, I'll figure something out. Just wanted to let anyone know that I'm not giving up on this.



JAKE DELHOMME IS HORRIBLE

WORLD SERIES CHAMPS!!!

CHAMPS!!! FINALLY!!! So much has gone on, just need to let it all soak in. Let's get two!

World Series Preview: Phillies v. Rays

Well here is something I never thought I'd write about, the Philadelphia Phillies in the World Series. It has been 15 long years since the Phillies were in the World Series, and I was there for two of the games. Needless to say the wait has been long overdue. Amazingly I can still fit into my '93 World Series shirt, which is no testament to my physical fitness, but more to the gigantic size of that original shirt when I was a mere 10 years old.


Joe Carter ended that World Series in one of the most famous, well from where I was standing infamous, moments ever. Although a big time fan at the time, I still did not fully understand the impact of that loss. Sure the Phils losing was a bummer, but at that age, I figured we'd dust ourselves off and see you in the World Series a year or two later. Instead it has taken the Phightens the seemingly full 15 years to overcome that Carter bomb off of Wild Thing. Signing the key components of that '93 team like Lenny Dykstra and Darren Daulton cost the Phils millions. A couple of poor free agent signings after wards like Danny Tartabull (see. 1997) and Gregg Jefferies left the ownership gun shy as attendance and dollars lagged. It was a long road back and the Phillies opted for drafting and being cheap.


Sure there were some rays of hope in those lost years. Scott Rolen came and went, Curt Schilling similarly was traded for nothing, Mike Lieberthal was never anything more than a slightly above average catcher, hell we even had high hopes for Ricky Otero. That's how bad things got. We wanted to win so badly we'd put our faith in Ricky Otero! In the process the team piled and piled up losses. I watched and watched wondering if it was normal to just not field a good baseball team for this long. Is this the way it always was? The Braves were always competitive, the Twins had won a couple of World Series, and there were always the teams with the history like the Red Sox or the Yankees waiting to break out. The Phils though, they just stayed stagnant. We were thinking Rico Brogna was underrated and hoping Tyler Green could stay healthy to become the ace we hoped he would be. All in all, our team could not come together enough to even grant us a playoff berth until a year ago, where they were steamrolled by the Colorado Rockies.


With each compounding year the frustration grew. Were the Phils always that bad or did our desperation to get back to the World Series just crush players like Rolen, like Oter...ok maybe not, but you catch my drift. For all the chagrin the Phillies were going through, there were small steps being taken to create the team we have today. Selecting Jimmy Rollins in 1996, Pat Burrell in 1998 (1st Overall), Brett Myers in 1999, Chase Utley in 2000, Ryan Howard in 2001, and Cole Hamels in 2002. Very rarely do a string of players work out so well, and players that were brash, cool under the collar and focused on winning as those 6 players. Rollins the unflappable leader, Burrell the man almost broken by Philly fans only to find the kind of player he is and on the brink of winning a World Series, Myers the controversial on and off the field player who has matured into a pitcher that can go a full 9 innings, Utley the contradictory hard-nosed/laid back Cali guy, Howard the large power hitter once dangled in front of teams for trading when Jim Thome was blocking his path, and Hamels, the ace the Phillies desperately needed but would never pay for.





Of course there were a lot of other pieces that had to fall into place, but the Phillies finally found their bearings. They build up there core from the inside. The only big name free agent they ever signed post Danny Tartabull was Jim Thome. A new stadium got built, fans got excited, and those core players were given a couple of years to mature. Two of those players have been MVP's of the league, with Howard a possibility again this year and Utley an inevitability. Hamels will surely win at least one Cy Young in his career to go along with his NLCS MVP Award, Burrell is among the Phillies all-time leaders in home runs, and Brett Myers might have figured out how to be an effective top line pitcher. This is a team like teams are meant to be built. It might have taken a little bit longer than most have liked, but this is surely one of the most likable Phils teams since '93.


All skippered by Charlie Manuel. Who after many years has finally, almost won over the Phillie fans. His country slang and out of shape physique certainly did not demand respect, but admittedly after some rough times transitioning to the Philly lifestyle has become the kind of manager you want. The team loves him, and his moves have worked out as wonderful as anyone could have expected. Matt Stairs anyone?


In as unlikely a scenario they will be going up against the Tampa Bay Rays. A team that had their fair share of losses, but built this American League Championship team seemingly overnight. Coming out of nowhere and from the worst record in baseball last year, the Rays were one of the top teams in baseball all year long. They too hit a string of great draft picks: Carl Crawford, B.J. Upton, Evan Longoria and David Price. Picking players like Carlos Pena off the garbage heap and building their entire bullpen off of people no one else wanted. That has to say something for the brain trust in TB.


It is great for the Rays as a team, but I will say that there are not a less deserving group of fans out there. Should the Rays win, do they deserve it more than Cubs fan? No. More than the Phillies? No. Sure the Rays were horrible, but the 'fans' were never there. Even through most of this year, until the playoffs started, no one showed up to these games. Next thing you know fans have a custom haircut and stole a line from one of the most overdone, yet funny, Saturday Night Live skits of all time. Real creative. Sure there might be some diehard fans that were there from the beginning, but 97% of them are complete bandwagon jumpers. It's the lone negative of this Rays season.


As for the Series itself, it's not going to be easy. Are the Rays a better team? Probably. They do everything a little bit better than the Phils minus closing games, which could be taken care of with David Price being promoted to that role. The Rays have a greater homefield advantage which could pose a problem, and their pitching depth could keep the Phils big bats quiet. The Phils are no pushovers but as much a team of destiny as the Phils seem to be, the Rays seem to match them +1. Although, as much of a roll as the Rays on, so were the Dodgers. The Phils wouldn't be able to beat CC Sabathia in the NLDS, they did. The Phils have come up in huge situations and gotten a lot of breaks along the way. Things just seem to be swinging the Phils way that some crazy moments are going to tell the tale of this World Series.


The Phillies have the experience and I think more grit. They know what it is to lose, to want a little more than the Rays. I know I do.

Phillies 4-2

Music Review: Metallica - Death Magnetic

Thank you Sarah Palin. As I was thinking of a way to start off this article, I was kind of stuck. Then Sarah Palin and the VP Debate rolled through. Leading up to this debate the folksy looker from Alaska had taken shots for some televised interviews and public opinion of her was falling dramatically. Essentially the expectations of her were so low that unless she dropped the N-bomb or vomited all over herself, then her first debate appearance would be considered a success (to paraphrase and reword a joke from SNL).

The point? Sarah Palin's expectation level for the debate are the same as the expectations on Metallica for their new album Death Magnetic. Basically, give us an album that sounds like Load and we'll get by, but for the love of God don't vomit all over yourself (aka St. Anger). Well, Metallica didn't vomit all over themselves. With St. Anger, the band was falling apart. Lead singer James Hetfield was in rehab, long time bassist Jason Newstead quit the group, and recording carried on and on and on...What was produced was a 'sonic abortion' of a band crumbling under the weight of their greatness.

The product was an attempt to veer the band in a new direction, but without the focus, drive, and balls to pull it off. Five years have passed, and Metallica seems to acknowledge the monumental mistake that St. Anger was. To atone, they finally got rid of Producer Bob Rock, who has worked with Metallica since the Black Album, and brought in Rick Rubin (Linkin Park, Beastie Boys) to lend his ear to the process. A sober (whether that is good or bad is debatable) and focused Metallica knew what their mission was. Saving their legacy.

Everything about Death Magnetic is an appeal to 'Tallica fans to show them the old guys still got it. The old logo is back, the classic CD look is in place, and we have our 6-9 minute songs and even an instrumental! Guitars and volume a plenty. There have even been complaints that when the album was mastered (...of puppets, heh) it was mixed in a way that the high volume levels do not allow for the finer impressions of the music to come through upon listening. Basically, people are saying it's too fucking loud. Isn't saying a Metallica album is too loud is like saying Megan Fox is too hot, a beer is too cold on a hot day, Brad Lidge is too dominant? This is the way things should be.

Anyway, Metallica did put there all into this album. The guitar rifts and solos will melt your face and the volume, oh it's there. Essentially, it's all you could have hoped for if you are a Metallica fan. Meaning it's solid, not embarrassing, and you can go on liking your favorite band a little longer because they're not washed up shells of their former self. It's not ...And Justice for All and they will never be like that again. This album is like Load and Kill 'Em All. Or as I like to put it, if Metallica were all 20 yrs old and coming out in today's music scene, this is what they'd sound like. Thrash and original to themselves, but not a part of any past, more of a present.

Musically, I think Death Magnetic is off the charts. Solos in The Day That Never Comes and my favorite song, End of the Line really make you happy to have stuck with Metallica.

Lyrics wise, their still weak. Hetfield is better than when he was going through rehab (there's not Fran-tick, tick, tick, tick tock). The issue has been the same since the Black Album where the lyrics are more internal. I'm going through this, I feel that, etc. The best albums of Metallica had observational lyrics, but you really felt the misery, anger, and struggle that they were telling you about.

A point on the album that absolutely pulls the whole theme together for me is in the last song My Apocalypse. A jam about half way through the song unleashes Metallica in all their musical force. It's at one time powerful and one time teetering on the brink of completely falling apart. They're playing so fast, so calculated, yet almost reckless. As if the slightest wavering of concentration could send limbs and instruments flying through the metal galaxy.

I'm glad to have a better and tolerable Metallica back in action.

Worth the Purchase: 4.0/5
Compared to Prior Works: 3.0/5
Progression: 3.5/5
Sound: 4.0/5
Production: 3.5/5

Final Score: 3.6/5

David Foster Wallace

With the recent and sudden passing of author David Foster Wallace, I decided to repost my review of his book, Consider the Lobster. I wrote this only a couple of months ago, but it is bizarre to think how much has changed. I was looking forward to reading the works of DFW for the rest of my life. Now I'll just have to re-explore his past works. Hopefully, this will motivate some people who never read DFW to go pick up one of this works.



Consider The Lobster by David Foster Wallace

One of the joys of my college experience was learning that I didn't have to take a math requirement. As a result I picked up a class titled Contemporary American Short Story. That class, ended up being one of my favorite during my time at college, and one of its lasting impressions was my introduction to David Foster Wallace. DFW has become one of my favorite authors and has the literary work to back it up.

His latest installment, Consider the Lobster, finds the always enlightening and entertaining DFW tackling everything from porn awards to John McCain on the campaign trail. He can write as intellectually and dramatically whether he is discussing double penetration shots or the lull of redundant speeches. The manner in which he, almost easily, transitions from a place of pure absurdity to the heights of intellectual prose is as impressive as it is depressing.

While the lyrical gymnastics DFW goes through makes you love to read his essays, at the same time, any one with any hope of ever publishing anything has to leave disheartened as DFW is certainly the foremost stylistic writer out there. You think he is just writing stream of thought through the way he presents himself, but when you take in the essays as a whole you realize that each piece of writing is incredibly intricate and imaginative that no human could spout out such words in such a format.

For people that aren't familiar with DFW, I probably wouldn't recommend starting with this book, but if you do, you'll know from the first story (the one about the porn awards) whether you're on board or not. The constant footnotes and long digressions could frustrate one that is not ready to commit fully to such a reading, and the reading only gets more difficult as the book progresses.

This book ranks up there with DFW finest works. If you are willing to commit to the reading and want to enjoy great essays on a wide variety of subjects, then give this book a go around.

For the ratings system I wanted to do something different than simple numbers. I want a symbol, like "Two Thumbs Up" like that. So I decided to flip the script. I'm using a symbol, but not a positive symbol. As a result of using a negative symbol instead of a scale of 1-5 with 5 being the best, one is the best because more of a negative thing would be bad. Follow?

So, what's something bad, related to books that I can rate these things with? Papercuts. Done.

1.5/5 Papercuts

NFL Preview: The East

Well, the season begins tomorrow, and I'm pumped. I missed football, and I'm glad it's back. Sure the Giants and Redskins "kicked off" the season on Thursday (if you wanted to call that game professional football), but the whole shebang gets going in 24 hours. Good times. Here are the final predictions for the divisions.

AFC East:

4. Miami Dolphins 3-13 (Last Year: 1-15)

The Dolphins narrowly avoided going winless last year, and will probably go through similar struggles this year. Their division is tougher, but the Phins have a head on their shoulders, so to speak, after bringing in The Big Tuna (ironic) Bill Parcells to revamp the team. #1 overall pick Jake Long will hopefully not be a bust at left tackle, and they plucked QB Chad Pennington from the waiver wire from the Jets. Sure Pennington isn't the long term answer, but he'll give the team some stability as they establish themselves.

Best Fantasy Player: Ronnie Brown, RB - Before going down by injury, Ronnie Brown was a very productive fantasy player. His injury history is a concern and apparently Ricky Williams is back in the mix, but this is Ronnie's year to prove himself not to be a bust.

3. Buffalo Bills 8-8 (Last Year: 7-9)

There is always a buzz around the Bills as an up and coming team. Now that J.P. Losman is thankfully removed at QB in favor of Senator Trent Edwards, the Bills may be turning a corner. As long as Marshawn Lynch can stay out of prison and Toronto brings the Bills north of the border, there are positives to be had.

Best Fantasy Player: Marshawn Lynch, RB - Marshawn had a rookie year of 1,000+ rushing yards and 7 TD's. I would look for those numbers to increase to close to 1,400 yards and 9 TD's. Enjoy it before he gets his new deal out of his rookie contract and subsequently becomes the new Pacman Jones.



2. New York Jets 9-7 (Last Year: 4-12)

Obviously the biggest story for the Jets was the acquisition of Brett Favre. This put the Jets on the map, and will be the move that everyone looks at for the Jets turn around. The real reason will be the Jets offensive line and the addition of All-Pro guard Alan Faneca. Look for Thomas Jones to have a big year. I think Favre will come out firing, but wear down as the season progresses. He'll throw his share of INT's and probably end up costing the Jets a playoff spot. However, if top pick Vernon Gholston turns out to be the beast a lot of people think he is, the Jets could bump up 2 wins.

Best Fantasy Player: Jerricho Cotchery, WR - Cotchery, not Coles will be the largest benefactor of Favre being the QB. Cotchery is a large receiver with good hands, and that is the kind of receiver Favre gravitates towards. Also, look out for TE Chris Baker to add some TD's to his solid receiving yard total.

1. New England Patriots 13-3 (Last Year: 16-0)

What a bizarre season for the Pats. The ultimate highs and the ULTIMATE low carried the Pats season. In the end, the mental strain of being undefeated was too much to handle. The Giants defensive line blew up the most prolific offense in the league, and it will be a challenge to see how the Pats rebound. Now, it's not the Pats goal to go undefeated again. It's their goal to win the Super Bowl. The Pats will almost be relieved when they lose their first game this year just to get that monkey off of their back. The looming cloud over this team is the possibility of QB Tom Brady's foot. Is it cracked? Is it broken? Is it bruised? Who knows? We're certainly not getting any info from Bill Belichick. On a side note, I read a Belichick biography this Summer, and the funniest part of the book was when the author mentioned Belichick's voice mail message. It was, "Sorry to have missed your call." That's it, and it's funny on about 12 levels if you know anything about Belichick.

Best Fantasy Player: Wes Welker, WR - He may not be the most prolific guy, but he's the best bet if Brady goes down to injury. He won't be hindered if back up Matt Cassell gets in the game, like Moss would, and the running game and Lawrence Maroney are a lost cause.

NFC East:

4. Washington Redskins 6-10 (Last Year: 9-7)

For all the good things the Skins did last year, having Joe Gibbs retire and bringing on inexperienced Mike Zorn and implementing the 4th new offense in QB Jason Campbell's career, they took a big step back. The only positive is that a new running approach could benefit Clinton Portis, who was run into the ground last year. Things are gonna get off to a slow start in the nation's capital.

Best Fantasy Player: Clinton Portis, RB - He is their go to guy. Someone has to score the TD's.

3. NY Giants 9-7 (Last Year: 10-6)

No matter how lucky the Giants were last year, no matter what they lost on defense, they are...the defending Super Bowl Champions, and they can't miss the playoffs. Can they? Anyway, I can't really talk much about the Giants. Them and Eli Manning winning the Super Bowl was an absolutely scarring sports experience. Let me also say, shame on all you Eagles fans that WANTED the Giants to beat the Pats. First off, you can never EVER root for the NY Giants unless they're playing an intergalactic football team for control of the planet Earth, and you know what, I'd have to wait and see what the aliens had to say before I made my choice. Secondly, and this is what bothered me the most...the only reason Eagles fans wanted the Giants to beat the Pats was because they hated the Pats because they were jealous of their success. As petty as that sounds, that was the reasoning. What bothers me about that is if the Eagles were in the Pats situation, these same people would be the most obnoxious annoying fans that have ever set foot on this planet. I hate you all. And here is the nail in the coffin for all you "I'm just rooting for the Giants in this game" fans. I hope this makes you sick.

Best Fantasy Player: Plaxico Burress, WR - Let's see, Plax had 1,025 receiving yards and 12 TD's with a bum shoulder, bum ankle, never practicing, and a non-Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning throwing him the ball. I see a better year ahead.

2. Philadelphia Eagles 10-6 (Last Year: 8-8)

This is the first year since I've been doing this that I haven't picked the Birds to win the division, and can you blame me? A couple of lackluster/borderline heartbreaking years have left my beloved Birds at a crossroads. This is it for Donovan McNabb. If he wants to QB in Philly next year, then he has to have an MVP quality year, which isn't totally out of the question. The Birds made some game changing moves by adding CB Asante Samuel and drafting potential Rookie of the Year candidate Desean Jackson. There is a lot to be excited about, and lately the Birds have been picked to go the the Super Bowl (by ESPN and Sports Illustrated)! To be honest, I was gonna pick the Birds to be 7-9 this year, but all this buzz has suckered me into a 10-6 year. I'm looking forward to the year. It could be something unexpected.

Best Fantasy Player: Brian Westbrook, RB - The NFL's leader in all-purpose yards last year will have an absolutely phenomenal year. This is his time to separate himself from every other RB on the planet. His ability to catch the ball out of the backfield will be taken to a whole new level, especially with new RB Lorenzo Booker in the backfield. The options are boundless.

1. Dallas Cowboys 11-5 (Last Year: 13-3)

At this point, expecting Tony Romo to perform in the playoffs is like expecting to have your dinner in Hell's Kitchen arrive on time. When you add in the fact this guy is STILL with Jessica Simpson and her idiot brain doesn't say much about his decision making. The Cowboys are going for it, and they have all the cards in place to make a legitimate run. Their defense is overrated by a ton, and Pacman Jones is going to have a minimal impact. Plus, the story line that is going unnoticed is that this team is a powder keg of people. Terrell Owens, Pacman, Tank Williams, I mean come on something has to give. I'm putting the Cowboys on notice, their window for winning a Super Bowl is now at 2 years. The team is getting older, and once TO is washed up Romo won't be as effective and it will be a whole domino effect. When you're entire team rests on the performance and mental stability of Terrell Owens, you have to count your blessings each year.

Best Fantasy Player: Marion Barber, RB - He's a TD machine. Felix Jones isn't a threat to his playing time. Look for a typical 80 yard 1 TD game from Barber. I think he'll make it to 20 TD's this season.